Monday, May 2, 2011

Post-Vote Brain Break

The polls are just about to open in ET, CT, and MT, another half hour for PT, and they're already open in the Maritimes and Newfoundland. So you should go out and vote, and then come back and read this brain break.

Are any of the leaders going to have a good day today? Watch the outreach of my investigative journalism as I check with the experts—also known as, reading their horoscopes.

In the process of doing this I discovered that all of the leaders were born sometime between April 30th and July 22nd. Is that weird or is that weird? Why are they dominating one quarter of the year? Both the Amazing Housemate and I also have birthdays between April 30 and July 22, does this mean we are destined to be in politics?

Anyway, this means that several of the leaders share signs, which sounds like it would make things more boring, but actually is really interesting when you look at WHO shares signs.

Stephen Harper and Michael Ignatieff—Taurus

Your workload will increase dramatically over the next few days, so make sure you get your chores out of the way as quickly as possible. If you fall behind now it may be a long time before you catch up again, so get it done.

That it will… that it will…

No matter how modest your goals are today, there will be some foggy energy or friendship dramas that could interrupt things and make major forward movement difficult right now. But do not worry! You will have a realistic awareness of what you can and cannot accomplish, so this will help keep things in perspective -- and you in a positive frame of mind. So save what you can't get done today, and deal with it another day -- it isn't going anywhere anytime soon.

Ha. Hahaha. “You will have a realistic awareness of what you can and cannot accomplish.” “Deal with it another day—it isn’t going anywhere anytime soon.” Hahaha.

Jack Layton and Gilles Duceppe—Cancer

If you force yourself to do something when your heart isn’t in it it’s unlikely you will make a very good job of it. Maybe it would be better to put it off until you are in a more receptive frame of mind.

Ohh. Hidden meaning?

Regarding your current struggle or debate, you should know that there are more people on your side than aren't ... and the people who aren't don't have much pull with the powers that be. Keep pushing for what you want, and keep talking to the people who can help make it happen. You're gaining real momentum, and you could reach an exciting tipping point today. Whatever has been holding you back is long gone -- and it's not coming back! Stay with this positive frame of mind.

You can tell this is Jack Layton’s horoscope because it has the words “gaining momentum” in it. I don’t see how it applies to Gilles Duceppe, though… but then he’s a borderline case, maybe he’s really a Leo. Let’s see what the Leo horoscopes are…

You seem to be holding back from taking risks, even quite small ones, and that's a shame because if you push yourself hard today chances are it will pay off in a big way. Don’t just think about it – do it!

Yep, that’s more like Duceppe…

Try not to confuse a growing sense of responsibility with a growing sense of guilt. The associations you are making with other people right now are a sign of your growth. You are more connected with a few people and it is effecting your sense of duty -- these people rely on you, and this may be a new feeling. Give yourself a chance to get used to it. But if you keep following your own goals and making decisions based on your own priorities, there is nothing wrong with that.

Is this about his association with the PQ?

Elizabeth May—Gemini

If you allow a feud to linger on much longer the results could be disastrous, so get to the root of it today and either agree to be friends or agree to stay out of each others way. Is a compromise solution really so hard?

I feel like this would have been more appropriate (or more hilarious) as Harper and Ignatieff’s horoscope.

After a spontaneous conversation with a casual acquaintance today, you could gain greater insight into the things that have been troubling you lately. The key is to listen intently and be ready to hear some things that may make you a little uncomfortable -- new ideas are not always palatable. If you ignore the realities of the external world, you won't get very far. You will have to face up to reality and pay more attention to the things that really matter.

Well, this isn’t too applicable. Except maybe the “face up to reality” part?

Anyway. If you've read this before voting, you can now vote already knowing the future!

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